Tag Archives: 12 Steps

We love and feel loved

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Nov. 3, 2025

We spent this last week at home in Utah for personal business, doctor appointments, temple sessions, and time with family. While there we were able to help our son Mike and his family relocate from Santaquin to Eagle Mountain. We had several gatherings with other family members and celebrated Halloween, Melanie’s birthday (see Olive Garden picture) and our 45th Wedding anniversary (see picture of music video) with them. Being late fall, we enjoyed gathering up and bagging the golden leaves (picture). Mom lost her wedding ring in the leaves, so we thought. We prayed, and were led to find it in one of the fingers of her gardening glove. Just before returning to Maui we were able to spend a couple hours with our daughter Lisa from Alaska, whom we haven’t seen for a year.

While away we continued to do what we could to further our service on Maui. We conducted our weekly Addiction Recovery Program (ARP) Meeting by Zoom, compiled some helpful information for ARP participants to find additional support, and coordinated a few speaking assignments in various wards on Maui. We continue planning for our 2026 Maui ward youth handcart trek. We are very grateful for our Sunday School president who substituted teaching our youth Sunday School class, and for senior missionary Elder Taylor who substituted for us at the in-person ARP meeting. Not to forget Elder and Sister Marriott who take us to and from the airport each time we travel. 

We are glad to be back on Maui. We have come to love and feel loved by our friends here. Our Kahului 1stWard Newsletter editor asked us to compose a message about our work as service missionaries. The following is the result of that request.

“Simon Peter walked on the water; even if but for a moment.” We spoke these words one night at the Addiction Recovery Program (ARP), called Healing through the Savior. Each participant had just shared some setbacks, hopes and successes regarding their addictions. At the end we bore our testimony that Jesus knows and understands through his Atonement (Alma 7:11-13). “Jesus honors efforts of faith;” we said, “even if we stumble.” Like Peter, a miracle happened as he walked on the water; even if but for a moment.” Earlier, Joan and I had visited Maui’s sacred Iao Valley and ascended to the needle viewpoint. I asked Joan, “What is your favorite New Testament scene?” She replied, “Jesus walking on the water.” I tapped my phone and opened to Mathew 14 and we quietly read the story. “The ship was now in the midst of the sea, tossed with the waves: for the wind was contrary…Jesus went unto them, walking on the sea…Lord, if it be thou, bid me come unto thee on the water. And he said, Come. And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water…” When he sank, Jesus did not give up on Peter; both of them were well aware of the dangers of the sea, but Jesus honored his effort and momentary success, “And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught him…” At Iao, we walked down the many steps to the river where we waded out into the water, sat on a large boulder, reflecting and sensing truth. To our friends in addiction recovery we testified of our Lords honoring of our attempts at faith and as we call on Him, will save us when we fall.

Our hearts are broken when we hear of broken lives, and broken relationships. Addiction or other compulsive behaviors seems to break everything that is good. As Service Missionary Group Leaders, we have conducted support meetings on Maui for about six months. We also conduct a weekly remote session by Zoom for participants on Maui, Moloka’i, and Lana’i. We have learned much on how to conduct these meetings and how to provide love and support to those with compulsive or addictive behaviors. With the Savior in our hearts, compassion comes naturally.

Since these meetings are anonymous and confidential, we don’t take roll but they speak by first names. As we read and discuss the 12 steps of recovery we sense a measure of their pain followed by the hope they feel as they seek Healing through the Savior. Their observations about Gospel principles are often profound. Their sharing can be heartbreaking, and we are anxious for their success in recovery. They plead for help. Sister Hardman and I invite all of you to pray for us and for the people we serve. Pray that each will find grace and power in Christ and make progress. The work blesses Sister Hardman and me, our relationship and even our family.

Jesus came with healing in His wings and is mighty to save. He lives to bless us with His love. In Addiction Recovery meetings all find hope, help and healing, even those whose hearts break for their loved-ones. In Healing through the Savior, we find Him.

Oct. 13, 2025 – Fellowshipping and Fellow Missionaries

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Serving requires compassion and emotional resilience, either because of our own shortcomings, or because of heartbreak in the lives of those we serve in the Addiction Recovery Program (ARP). I’m trying to learn more each week to find peace in the Lords way, “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” (John 14:27)

We had the blessing of attending Zone Conference this past week with the full-time missionaries. Although not officially part of the full-time mission, we felt welcomed and loved. We cross paths with them regularly as they often have friends (investigators) that need support in the ARP. The full-time missionary senior couples in particular have adopted us, befriended us, and encouraged and supported us ever since we arrived six months ago. They invited us as usual to their senior couple dinner the night before Zone Conference, and then encouraged us to attend. We are part time service missionaries serving under the direction of our local stake president, so we felt a little out of place but they treated us as part of the mission. (See Zone Conference photo)

We are not the only ones who need faith in times of fear. We listened carefully as the Mission Leaders taught important principles to the missionaries. My notes included:

President Anderson

  • “Fear does not come from God…”
  • “It is hard to be truly humble so He humbles us…”
  • “Hundreds of miracles are happening all over the mission…”
  • “How have I seen Gods hand in my life today? Write it in your journal.”

Sister Anderson

  • “Avoid comparing ourselves with others. We are miserable when we do…”
  • “Emulate with charity…take the good of others…”
  • “Let God prevail in your life.”

This Zone Conference experience brought back memories from the mission of my youth forty-five years ago in California. At that time I remember not only my interest in sharing the gospel, but my heart-felt interest in the missionaries, their spiritual and emotional success. As an assistant to the president those many years ago, I felt a strong desire to teach, encourage, and love my fellow missionaries and leaders. We felt that great spirit of unity, purpose, and love this past week with the full-time missionaries. Our participation concluded with a group photo and lunch. 

Sister Hardman and I now conduct two ARP support meetings each week. One of the meetings is in-person with participants at our local stake center high-council room. The other is by Zoom so that people from distant locations can participate including Hana, Molokai, and Lana’i. Participation varies from a few to a dozen each week. Per policy and instructions, what is shared by participants during the meeting is not discussed outside the meeting to encourage helpful sharing between them. However, we encourage everyone to be aware of the program and its blessings. To do so, you may want to watch or listen to one or more recorded ARP meetings which exist to support persons who can’t attend or who haven’t felt the need or courage yet to attend. Here are a few places you can go to see what it’s all about. 

The last one in the list, the “Coming Back” Podcast, is not an official church production, but on a recent scenic drive to Hana, Joan and I felt heartbreak for what this individual went through in part due to addictions. We were grateful to learn of the many miracles experienced by him and his family. It gave us hope for the people that we meet every week in our service. We also found renewal in socializing with some adult couples in the Kihei Ward.

As members of the church, we have been friendshipping a neighbor family. They are kind and love to speak about Jesus Christ. One is a member and the other two are not. The member hasn’t been attending for several years but they all express interest in coming to church again. We had previously introduced them to the missionaries and on Saturday the missionaries invited us to visit with them together. We listened at length while the inactive brother shared his love of God and Christ but also shared many pains and disappointments he was carrying in his heart. After some time we asked if we could read scriptures with him. He said, “How about right now.” We found a somewhat private place in the apartment common area and each of us shared a favorite Book of Mormon scripture. Knowing of the wrestle this brother was having, when it was my turn I chose Enos who wrestled with the Lord and later after much prayer found peace and healing. “Enos, thy sins are forgiven thee, and thou shalt be blessed. And I, Enos, knew that God could not lie; wherefore, my guilt was swept away. And I said: Lord, how is it done? And he said unto me: Because of thy faith in Christ… wherefore, go to, thy faith hath made thee whole.” (Enos 1:5-8)

After we all shared a scripture we each bore testimony to him of the truth of the Gospel and of God’s love for us and for him. We felt the Lords spirit there and were grateful to be a part of that meeting.

On Sunday, as directed by our stake president we attended two wards for sacrament meeting and to make brief announcements in Priesthood and Relief Society regarding the ARP. “I enjoyed the ward-hopping,” Sister Hardman said. We then enjoyed a Zoom call with our children and grand-children.

Sep. 8, 2025 – Broken hearts and miracles

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Our hearts are broken when we hear of broken lives, and broken relationships. Addiction or other compulsive behaviors seems to break everything that is good. We are often asked to share some of our personal experience working in the addiction recovery program (ARP). Since participation is anonymous to encourage honesty and supportiveness, people introduce themselves by their first name only and we promise not to share what is shared at support meetings. But we can share our feelings, published materials and general experience. We invite you to listen with your heart as we try to express what has become deeply meaningful to us as service missionaries, and as children of God, brothers and sisters to all of God’s children.

Paraphrasing from program guidebooks, Healing through the Savior, 12-step Addiction Recovery Program of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is available to anyone who desires assistance in recovery from any addictive substance or compulsive behavior, or anyone desiring to seek change in their life. The meetings are held in a dedicated church meetinghouse and are structured, not an open forum to talk about problems. The program is based on the Alcoholics Anonymous 12-Step program, but has been adapted to the doctrines, principles, and beliefs of the Church. It is based on recovery through repentance and the power of Jesus Christ and His Atonement. The weekly meetings are conducted by senior missionaries throughout the world with the help of a facilitator who is a recovering addict. The first miracle we notice each week is within our own hearts. As each participant walks through the door we feel nothing but Christ-like love for them; all judgment and criticism is taken from our hearts. The next miracles happen as the meeting progresses and they feel love from one-another and from God. The first part of each meeting includes group reading about one of the twelve steps. The reading material has been prayerfully composed by persons who have experienced hope and progress in applying the respective principles of action and recovery. The last part of the meeting gives the participants the opportunity to share their experiences of challenge, faith and repentance, which often encourages others. Love, and the spirit of the Lord is very strong in these meetings as all learn about, apply, and have success using God’s grace.

At the end of the meeting, a senior missionary is invited to bear testimony of how the Atonement of Jesus Christ has blessed them personally. These are sacred moments where Sister Hardman or I have pondered the Lords personal and infinite Atonement, given us great hope, and the Spirit confirms truth to our souls which we then testify with all our hearts to the participants. Truly the healing power of Christ is enabled and the spirit of God is felt. All are invited to find a life of peace, freedom and even joy, encircled in the arms of God’s mercy. Jesus came with healing in His wings and is mighty to save. He lives to bless us with His love. In Addiction Recovery meetings all find hope, help and healing, even those whose hearts break for their loved-ones. In Healing through the Savior, we find Him.

Invitation – For those interested in more details, attached is my personal summary of the 12-steps along with a few relevant scriptures and expected actions. We are finding that these principles and step-by-step approach to repentance is applicable to all of us and all our repeating behaviors that we would like to resolve. I now think of it as a master-class in applying the Atonement of Jesus Christ in my own life. If you’d like to give it a try, think of a compulsive behavior that you have, a behavior that is controlling your life in unfavorable ways, then intentionally work through these steps to apply the principles and regain your agency and make more meaningful progress in Coming unto Christ and being perfected in him. For example, I would like to be less judgmental and more patient with myself and others. This divine process is working for me. As I sincerely and intentionally apply these steps to me, I am making progress. I have more hope for myself and for others. I am enjoying more joy in the Lord.

Healing through the Savior – The Addiction Recovery Program

12 Step Recovery Guide Summary of Key Principles, Action Steps, and Scriptures

2 Nephi 31:20, Mosiah 27:25, Alma 7:11-12, Ether 12:27, Moroni 10:32

Step – Title (Key Principle)Action StepsScripturesPersonal Notes
1 – Admit that you, of yourself, are powerless to overcome your addictions and that your life has become unmanageable. (Honesty)Let go of pride and seek humilityBe honest and talk to someoneAttend meetings2 Nephi 4:18-21Enos 1:4Alma 32:13-16 
2 – Come to believe that the power of God can restore you to complete spiritual health. (Hope)Develop a correct understanding of God’s characterPray and study the scriptures.Phil 4:13Mosiah 7:33, 4:9Helaman 3:29 
3 – Decide to turn your will and your life over to the care of God, the Eternal Father and His Son, Jesus Christ. (Trust in God)Decide to trust and obey GodReview and renew covenants with GodLuke 22:41-42Rev 3:202 Ne 10:24Mosiah 4:20 
4 – Make a searching and fearless written moral inventory of yourself. (Truth)Write an inventory with a sponsor’s helpProv. 3:5James 2:17-182 Nephi 4:19 
5 – Admit to yourself, to your Heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ, to proper priesthood authority, and to another person the exact nature of your wrongs. (Confession)Share our inventories from step 4 with our sponsors and confess our sins to God and proper priesthood authorities as neededLet peace into our lives.Isaiah 1:18Mosiah 26:29Alma 22:18, 39:7, 39:13D&C 58:43 
6 – Become entirely ready to have God remove all your character weaknesses. (Change of Heart)Be willing to change through the power of GodFind connection with others in recovery and at churchEz. 36:26Mosiah 3:19, 5:7Alma 22:15-18D&C 50:40-42 
7 – Humbly ask Heavenly Father to remove your shortcomings. (Humility)Ask God to do what we cannot do for ourselvesStudy the sacrament prayersJohn 15:4-5, 10-11Mosiah 4:2-3, 5:7-9Moroni 4:3, 5:2 
8 – Make a written list of all persons you have harmed and become willing to make restitution to them. (Seeking Forgiveness)Write a list of people we might have offended or harmedForgivePray for charity.Matt 18:21-22, 32-33Luke 6:37-381 John 4:18-19Moroni 7:47 
9 – Wherever possible, make direct restitution to all persons you have harmed. (Restitution and Reconciliation)Approach othersRecognize the blessings of recoveryMosiah 27:35Alma 34-31-32, 39:12-13D&C 1:32 
10 – Continue to take personal inventory, and when you are wrong promptly admit it. (Daily Accountability)Spiritual preparation for each dayDaily repentance.Luke 9:23Mosiah 4:30Alma 5:14-15, 7:23Moroni 6:8 
11 – Seek through prayer and meditation to know the Lord’s will and to have the power to carry it out. (Personal Revelation)Come unto Jesus Christ through prayer, fasting, and meditationMeditate in stillness and quietRomans 8:26Alma 7:233 Ne 20:1D&C 6:36, 42:61 
12 – Having had a spiritual awakening through the Atonement of Jesus Christ as a result of taking these steps, share this message with others and practice these principles in all you do. (Service)Serve othersParticipate in temple and family history workLuke 22:32Romans 1:16Mosiah 2:17, 28:1-4Alma 5:14, 29:9-10Mormon 9:11, 16-19 

Hardman Rev: Sep. 9, 2025 (Reference. Healing through the Savior, The Addiction Recovery Program, 12-Step Recovery Guide, 2024 Intellectual Reserve, Inc.)

(For more information about Healing through the Savior including videos and podcasts of recovery meetings see addictionrecovery.churchofjesuschrist.org)